Oh The Awkwardness That Is I. . .

So, progress of getting letters and applications mailed is going rather slowly. I had planned to have my application mailed in last Friday to YWAM, but my doctor was on vacation. That's the last thing i needed to submit my application. OHH the frustrations! Ok, so maybe I'm a wee bit dramatic? Nah. Who knew that a medical release form would take three weeks to complete? Like woah, i know. I'm going to not stress because i really have no control over it and stressing only causes my head to swirl. I'll hopefully be sending out my newsletter before i head off to camp. whoop!

I have mixed feelings about camp of champions this year. Reason number one being that they have moved the forever loved and treasured location from PBJ State Park to some camp ground in Alabama. The new place looks lovely, so that's not it, it's the fact that i am a major introvert and my 'safety blanket' and any form of familiarity has been snatched. Yay. It will be good for me, i know it will. Reason number two is that this year i am going as a staffer/counselor. This part makes me super excited and slightly nervous. I love working with teenagers and am looking forward to what the week will bring, i guess i'm just kind of anxious? You never know who is going to come or what HE is going to do or say, but that is exciting. Expectation is good. Also, prayers would be nice. :)

I got my "big girl" license today. YAY ME! I have been waiting for four long and picture-ugly years to redeem that horrid monstrosity called a license photo. Every time that i had to pull it out to show to a cop or bank teller or waitress i would cringe. If you were to see it then i am pretty sure you would understand and sympathize with me. Seventeen, bad hair cut, awkward, ghostly pale, cheese-tastic smile. Need i say much more? Goodbye vertical monster, hello horizontal awkwardness. .....What? Awkwardness never leaves, silly.

I'm moving to Colorado in three months. Three months, guys! Can i be happy and sad about this? Ok, good. The weather will be great and the fact that my fingers are always so cold won't be completely bizarre. Bonus points! But madam shy pants will most likely get homesick. Let's hope not, but it is likely. I am SO excited though. My newsletter is almost ready. All i have to do is one last revision and then print and stuff 70+ envelopes. I must be a dork because that part makes me so happy. I love snail mail.

Revelation of the day: coffee tastes good with just about everything but it tastes tremendously delicious when paired with banana nut muffins. Om nom nom!

~me

Coffee Fairy

Tuesday i spent the greater half of the day and on into the night writing. Monday too, but Tuesday is what drained me. My final test and 10 page paper were due on Wednesday morning and i was scrambling to get the finishing touches on my paper. Grr. I stayed up until 5 am Wednesday morning and got up at 6:20am. I dreamed of literature and woke up with Joanna Newsom's song inflammatory writ stuck in my head. i kid you not. Took the test, the essay part was brutal. I think i did terrible. One hour of sleep will do things like that to you. However, teacher gave us a grace period to turn in our papers -- 5pm Thursday. THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU! It made life look a little brighter. At one point while i was taking that exam and scribbling away on paper i realized that i had more or less been continuously writing for the past 12 hours. People, that is not cool. My brain has reached its limit i'm afraid. hoorah?

I have a Dr. for a sister now. She's so cool. Graduation was yesterday afternoon and it was far from boring but definitely long. 73 new Dr.'s. The storm blowing through took out the power on campus and all over S-ville. Made for a weird experience, especially the reception since it was at the V-school. c-r-e-e-p-y. Chats with Mr. G about missions and working with kids. Caught me off guard some. J.H. Ranch.

Youth Church practice at La's and Rudy's. Utilizing the daylight. Pro. Hunger pains were attacking the majority of the crew. Plan of action was put into play. Grilled the foodsen and ate by candle light. The stars....oh the stars were beautiful. Won't get that kind of a view in the middle of town ever again. G.C. goes home to where there is power. 2 papers left to finish. Sorrows. Little sis spent the night, she was sort of stranded.

And now that i have been successful at procrastinating.... i guess i'll get to work on finishing that horrid paper. yikes! wish me luck and stuff...or the abundance of creative juices.

Where is my coffee fairy when i need her?

~me

Coffee > School

Here's a thing that boggle my mind: people who love school to death.
I would have loved to be one of those people but sadly i am not. The semester is slowly rounding down and my nerves are shooting up. I should learn not to panic. I should also learn to stay ahead in my studies. I'll let you know when i succeed with either. I have to find a science fiction novel to do a TEN page paper on. ACK! I am a slow reader...remind me again why i chose to take another english class? yea. OK, we'll call this a ramble and make it a day...or afternoon.

My new coffee thermos is the bees knees. Yes, i just used that phrase, judge me at your own risk. My coffee is warm and cognitive pschology is about to get conquered. Debating on playlist choice. . . .The National, Stars or Joanna Newsom?

~Me

Pie

I had pie. i've been wanting pie for a few days and if you look at my notes from school today you will see that that was quite evident. also, my psychology teacher was talking in class today about how when you study for class that memorization does not cut it. she strongly believes in semantic coding; M-E-A-N-I-N-G. i totally agree, so then she expounded upon this and how your environment is a factor in this, when you're studying and testing. I knew this from long ago, but then she said that if you study with caffeine then you should test highly caffeinated. it's actually proven to improve your test scores. sweet! not that i needed permission or whatnot, but being told to drink more coffee is *fine* by me! wheee! i absolutely love psychology class.

Spring break is quickly approaching. i always want to spell spring break with a capital "S" and "B". . .like it's some kind of important holiday i guess? anyway, it's coming up and i am mad'am planner. yikes! 4-5 girls, one car, camping, hiking, and lots of F-U-N. i'm hoping everything gets worked out in time and that i don't loose my head mean while. my government teacher decided to give us a test the thursday *after* we come back instead of before. i'm not sure i'm in total favor of this idea. also, i'd like a personal masseuse, please and thank you. tense shoulders. they need some love, mhmmm.

i currently smell like cigar smoke. no, i wasn't smoking. hullo, former asthmatic. time to wash clothes? i had fruit and coffee for breakfast. i had fruit and coffee for lunch. it was marvelous. the daffodils have come out. listening to mumford and sons by request of Rose. was in a Stars mood all day. accidentally yelled at a class mate while walking with him across campus. lesson: leaving one earbud in is still one too many when trying to talk to someone. my pie was delicious. lemon meringue. yes, you're allowed to be a wee jealous. <3

~Me

Walking Is Hard

Shin splints. They are evil and i would like it very much if they would stop happening. I think it must be the way i walk. I must walk funny. Or hard. Maybe i stomp? Whatever i do it has got to change. I found a campus bike today, but sadly (this is the part where you feel really bad for me) it was after i had walked all the way back across campus after my last class in agony and had almost made it to my car. I didn't care. I took it around the block and then peddled back to my initial destination. It made for a ridiculous yet fun trip.

I had a conversation with a classmate today about coffee. It all started with me walking across campus to my next class holding my coffee. He recognized me by my "curly hair and the fact i was holding coffee." Awesome. We discussed the effects of coffee and how much is too much, if there is even such a thing, and when you know you're an addict. He = noobie. I = veteran. I will teach the ways of drinking coffee...he needs lessons, he mentioned the forbidden word: decaf. I love coffee, in case i chance failed to mention that previously.

Also, i love dinosaurs and so then have decided for my upcoming birthday that i want a dinosaur cake. I think it would be awesome and appropriate...yea. I mean double-numbers are a big deal! The last time i had double-number birthday was when i was 11, so this double-number birthday calls for loads of fantastic ridiculousness! Aren't these amazing?


~Me

Cranberries!

Banana bread and coffee are being consumed. Delicious. Listening to the Cranberries and Jimmy Eat World. oh yea, happy new year! And i had just gotten used to writing "2010" and saying "twenty-ten" not "oh-ten". Now i have to start all over? le sigh.

Favorite lesson learned in 2010: Yielding to HIM brings both peace and joy. It is most rewarding in every regard. I could name off a handful of examples, but the point here is HE is good in all HE does. I am such a control freak, so when i don't know what's going on or if i can't see what's up ahead i get antsy and frustrated. HE knows that. HE wants that. If i profess to love HIM then my response to "go" or "say" or "do" this or that should be "yes!" without hesitation or a second look back. To love HIM means to heed to HIS voice, however quiet a whisper it may be. I always start off thinking that my plans are great and they will work out just right and things will be smooth and lovely because i am HIS. But that is only true if i am listening and obeying HIM. There is this great quote from Elisabeth Elliot that says, "I know no prayer other than 'Thy will be done'." How awesome would it be if we could live out that prayer...second by second, in the big things and the little things. Yielding my will to HIS will was probably one of the more painful yet rewarding experiences i have gone through. EMBRACE THE RELEASE.

I still have my Christmas lights up. Are there Christmas decoration fairies who will come and haunt me since it's now January? I put up a tapestry in my living room. It's big -- maybe 9'x4'? My mom had it in her apartment when she was in college. She used as a room divider, i use it as wall art. It's lovely. I like people. They're fun and different and come in so many varieties; kind of like jelly beans. I have this habit of inserting random CD's of my roommates into the stereo. Currently Playing: Broken Social Scene. I like it.

~Me