Walking should not be this complicated. And it's not, i think i just make it complicated. HE says do this, go here, say that, and all we are called to do is say "yes" and then walk. But like i said, walking is hard. I get tired of walking and tired of never seeing fruit, tired of never seeing the point. HE called me to something, but i don't get why or what for. Was i supposed to do something else, nothing at all...did i miss a detail in there somewhere?
This blog probably sounds either 1) really whiny, 2) really depressing or 3)dumb. I don't care at the moment. Judge me all you want. Do it. It won't get you far, i promise. Maybe it's the season i'm in, maybe it's my self absorbed attitude. most likely.
God doesn't call us to be happy, he calls us to be joyful. There is a difference. God also calls us to be obedient not guilt-tripped or ignorant. Shy is not a personality trait, it's an excuse. Get over it. Affirmation doesn't come from a nod, smile, joke or acknowledgement from someone else. It comes from God. Being invisible isn't a nice feeling. Neither is being ignored or ignoring others. Full circle. That just happened.
Where have you planted your feet? Are you walking in circles or straight ahead? Look UP...not in a mirror.
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